Thursday, December 02, 2004

"Why I hate your shit."

So I admit it. There is a lot of shit in this world that I dislike. A lot. I mean more than most. Or if not more than most, I'm more vocal about it. And it's not like I don't like it and let it be, it's like I don't like it and I have to tell you that it's shit.

Well, that's not really true. I've actually gotten a lot better about this. Now I only go off on people that insist on fucking with me about it. For the most part I don't evangelize about how they should stop liking whatever bullshit thing they're obsessed about at the moment. I just try to get the opposition (who's usually a raving lunatic about whatever it is I hate) to at least agree that I don't have to like their whatever-it-is.

One of the things that I'm constantly given shit about is my diet. This is because I fucking hate whole genres of food. Yeah, that's sounds like a pretty stupid thing to do... food prejudice. But nevertheless, I hate shit like seafood. Have I tried all seafood? Of course fucking not. What kind of stupid ass question is that? But what I have tried tasted and even felt fucking disgusting. So why the fuck would I want to try squid testicles? Because I might like them? Listen, there is enough food in this world that I do like that I don't think having to resort to eating squid testicles is necessary. If I should miss out... oh fucking well... more squid nuts for you and your pansy friends.

That shit goes for Chinese food, Indian Food, Polynesian Food, Mexican food (from Mexico... not Tex-Mex... that shit is good! Well, some of it is.), Thai Food, Vietnamese food, French Food.... let's just say damn near all food that isn't Tex-Mex, American, or Americanized Italian in nature. And even within those, I'm picky.

I like to think of it as God's way of keeping me from being 500 lbs. Ever see a picky fat kid? Yeah, didn't think so. I'm already 'not my ideal weight', and if I wasn't picky (and sometimes I do go without eating because I'm picky), I'd be waaay past my ideal weight.

And yes, this does go beyond food... like what broght this whole thing on: video games. I simply do not like certain games. The one that brought this on is Tekken 5. Now, I used to like Tekken, back when I didn't know any better, and we had a blast with Tekken 2. After that, I tuned out. I ended up tuning out of the whole 3D fighters thing in general. Virtua Fighter, Soul Calibur, Dead of Alive. Yeah, fuck those games. I mean, I guess they're OK. But I hate games where you can just mash buttons and 'special' moves come out. Sure, you can be good at these games, and mashing buttons isn't going to get you a win against a decent opponent, but in the fighting games I'm used to (that would be 2D fighting games for those of you keeping track at home) if you sucked at the game, you got fucking destroyed by a good player. If my wife can do even ONE special move, that game is suspect in my opinion.

This, of course, means that the games I like aren't the most popular games. Joe Schmoe doesn't wanna play a game where he gets destroyed everytime. He wants to know that he can hang with anyone. Even if it's just sometimes. This is the reason that the games that are the most popular are the "most suck" in my opinion. Counter-Strike is another fine example. From what I've heard, they have introduced more and more randomness to that game with every patch... thereby leveling the playing field. So, yay, more people can 'hang' now. Too bad the game is shit.

Other times I'll admit that a game is good, but for whatever reason I just didn't get into it. Take the Grand Theft Auto series. Please. (Ok, that was bad.) But yeah, take that series. I thought that GTA3 was, you know, pretty good. But it wasn't super fucking awesome in my book. So, I didn't buy Vice City. Other people loved the shit outta that game. I just happen to not. Now, with San Andreas, people were going nuts. People touting it as the BEST GAME EVER! WTF? It's the fucking same thing with new missions, people. Sure, it's pretty good, but so fucking what? There are a lot of pretty good games out there. Seriuosly. This one dude was adamant that I should go and buy San Andreas because it was so damn awesome. And I'm like... dude, if I didn't really care for GTA3, nor Vice City, why the fuck am I gonna be in love with San Andreas? That just doesn't make sense. Now, get off my balls about it.

Some people...

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