Thursday, October 21, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (10/21)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 10/21 - Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole

#1 Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse Village w/Madison
Notes: First things first: I know a lot of people will question this being in the top spot. This movie isn't for everybody. In fact, it's failing pretty miserably at the box office right now, and I'm not surprised. A lot of people will dismiss it as a "video game movie" or a "comic book movie", and that's unfortunate. I read a review (after watching it for myself) saying that SPVTW wouldn't reach anyone over the age of 25. This is nonsense. I'm in the upper half of "the mid 30's", and it affected me more than any other movie I've seen this year. Sure, I grew up on video games when they came on cartridges ("tapes" to my parents) and MTV before the advent of reality shows, but I mean, I connected with this movie on a level beyond the Zelda references and pop-up video presentation. Regardless of what the trailers and comic and video game blogs would have you believe, this movie is about interpersonal relationships between friends, lovers and siblings. Most people won't look past the computer graphics and ADD presentation, but somehow, it affected me. I'm not going to say that I related to it on a personal level because Scott's life and my life are quite dissimilar, but it made me re-evaluate and think about my own relationships. It may appear like I'm reading too much into a silly popcorn flick, but trust me, I wasn't going into this movie with a film student demeanor. I expected what everyone else expected: a bunch of pretty colors and nerdy references. But I saw what I saw and felt what I felt. And I felt genuinely bad for the some of the characters. Hell, I dreamt about them. You see, while the actual ending of the movie was fine, I personally saw no 'good' way to end the movie. So I think I subconsciously continued the movie in my head. And any movie that can make me do that deserves 4 stars and the top spot in my list. This movie is far more than it pretends to be, but I don't expect most people to understand, and that makes me a bit sad.

#2 Grease Sing-A-Along (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#3 Inception (****)
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: You'll notice that I didn't see this at the Drafthouse or in an XD Cinemark theater. We couldn't make it to the Drafthouse in our allotted babysitter time, and we DID buy XD tickets, but the XD theater's right front speaker was blown so we had to exchange tickets for a standard theater. Standard theaters suck. That being said, this movie did not suck. In fact, it was very good. It's the love child of Vanilla Sky (Abre Los Ojos) and Memento from the night they invited over The Matrix for a threesome. I'm suprised that it's so popular as its non-sequential presentation and nested realities can be disorienting for the less cerebral moviegoers. Had Nolan not directed The Dark Knight, this movie would have been relegated to the art house theaters. I would definitely recommend that people watch this movie, but honestly, it's not the movie of the century the way some people would have you believe. I think what's happening is that Inception is the first non-traditional, non-straightforward movie that a lot of people have seen, so they are astounded. If all you normally see is shit like Predators, Transformers and Twilight, then Inception seems like it's from another world. If you're already fans of Primer or Memento, you won't be as impressed.

#4 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#5 The Other Guys (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Claire
Notes: I fully admit that I had written off this movie based solely on the trailer. It looked horrible. But after a multitude of "Hey, it was pretty good!"s from a few sources and an offer to watch the kids from my sister-in-law just so that we could see the movie, I couldn't NOT go see it. And, yep, it was indeed pretty good! There were some very funny exchanges between Will Ferrell and Marky Mark, and a lot of over the top action. The slow-mo bar scene was brilliant. I found myself wishing it was a bit longer. The plot was absolutely throwaway garbage and simply existed to tie in the scenes in some loose fashion. This movie was just -made- to be chopped up into 30 3 minute youtube clips.

#6 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but it's also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#7 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#8 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#9 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#10 #Machete (***)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse Village w/Claire
Notes: Robert Rodriguez sure knows how to make a schlocky 1970's film in the 21st Century. If Planet Terror and Grindhouse were his tribute to the 1970's, this is his re-imagining of the genre. It was crude, rude and yes, even tattooed. But all in all it was fun, and exactly what I was expecting. One has to wonder though: if this film was made by a no-name director, would it even have been screened at mainstream theaters? Scott Sander's tribute to the 1970's Blaxploitation genre "Black Dynamite" was every bit as good as Rodriguez's "Machete", but have you even heard of that film? Didn't think so. P.S. It's good to see Don Johnson finding work again. :-)

#11 Exit through the Gift Shop (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#12 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#13 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#14 Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole (***) NEW
Place: 3D at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Madison
Notes: Honestly, I expected to like this more than I did. I mean, I liked it. But, well, I just expected more "something". I can't quite place what that "something" is... even now. I remember thinking that the trailers were breathtaking. And I do have to admit that this is probably the most technically proficient CG movie I've ever seen. The water and feather details were amazing. The 3D was used well. None of that "Comin' at Ya'" 3D crap. Honestly, with the resurgence of 3D in the late 2000's/early 2010's, I think we've kinda gotten passed that. I rarely see movies throwing spears toward the audience anymore. But, back to the movie. It was good. Voice acting was solid. The script was solid. The plot wasn't too preachy or anything like that. I dunno. It was solid movie with breathtaking CG. Nothing more to say really.

#15 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#16 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#17 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#18 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#19 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultural gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#20 The Last Exorcism (**)
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: This was one of the WORST movie-going experience of my life. It was even worse than the discount cinema experience (see the 'Splice' review!) Claire and I went to the 10:00pm showing on the Saturday of opening weekend. We expected it to be packed as I had heard some good things about the movie on a News 8 Austin movie review. (They gave it a 6 out of 8.) We got there around 9:15p and rushed to the ticket booth. As we approached, we noticed two large groups of black kids ranged from maybe 15 to 25 all huddled right in front of it. At first we thought they might have been 'in line' but, no, they were content just hanging out in front of the ticket booth for some reason. After we made our way around the crowd and got tickets, we made a beeline for the theater. To our surprise, even though it was just 35 minutes until showtime, there were only 3 people in the theater. We decided that we could both get snacks together since the theater was nearly empty. When we got to the lobby, the crowd of black kids was now huddled in front of the concession stand. Why? I haven't a clue, but there they were. Still, we worked our way passed them, got our snacks, and returned to the theater with plenty of time to spare. We sat in the 5th row, right in the middle. About 10 'til 10, two overweight ghetto girls plopped themselves right next to Claire and I. The one to my left could have passed for a 'Precious' stunt double. The one to Claire's right was white and wore about a pound of make-up. They both immediately pulled out their cell phones and started texting away. Yay. Through the previews and into the movie they texted. I noticed that the crowd seemed to be very loud even as the movie started. I looked around and was shocked to see that 70-75% of the crowd was black and/or ghetto. I checked my ticket stub. Nope, it wasn't a Friday movie we'd ventured into by accident. We slunked into our seats. They got louder and more rowdy. One of the texting girls kept smacking her mouth and shushing people so loudly that she was a disturbance herself. It was more than a bit ironic. Claire asked me if we should leave, but since we rarely get to go to the movies without the kids, I suggested that we just put up with it for a while longer. It got worse. People started laughing at the tense parts and yelling "That's my Nigga!" at the screen. From the 5th row, I counted 6 people texting/on their phones during the movie. (Side Note: They all had shitty phones!) By the end of the movie, I was furious. I've never once complained to theater management for anything, but I was heading right for the nearest manager as soon as the credits began to roll... not to get my money back, but simply to let him know that his ushers were worthless. As it turned out, I stumbled upon another patron complaining to the manager about the very same movie experience. I joined in and before too long, we were joined by another couple looking to complain. The manager seemed less that apologetic. He was more annoyed than anything, but he finally offered our money back. Horrible. The funny thing is that we were considering seeing the movie at Gold Class Cinema. Talk about the other end of the spectrum! Oh, and the movie? The last act needed a re-write. The first 2/3's of the movie were pretty enthralling and creepy. The wrapup was well... not consistent with the rest of the movie. Imagine if at the end of an Indiana Jones movie, it was all due to aliens. Wouldn't that be a jarring WTF? moment? Oh, wait.

#21 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#22 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#23 Predators (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Aaron
Notes: I've only seen the original Predator movie, and it's been a while since I've seen it. I've heard nothing but bad things about Predator 2 and the Aliens Vs. Predator series. In any case, this movie was OK. Decent amount of action. Throwaway plot. Pretty standard stuff. I have to mention that the CG was pretty shitty though. It had the worst CG fire I've ever seen.

#24 Splice (**)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Discount Theater by myself
Notes: It's an Adrien Brody double feature! (I saw this the week before Predators.) While I had low expectations for Predators, I had high expecations for Splice. I saw Forrest's enthusiastic Facebook posting about this movie which piqued my interest. Now, I had never seen a movie based on Forrest's recommendation, but he seemed like someone that can appreciate good cinema. He even cited the director's previous effort, Cube. I loved Cube. Splice kinda sucked though. Ridiculous plot. Almost no suspense or horror. Terrible CG. And the strangest/grossest sex scene ever. No more recommendations from Forrest.

#25 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#26 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#27 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#28 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Thursday, September 02, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (9/24)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 9/24 - The Last Exorcism and Machete

#1 Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse Village w/Madison
Notes: First things first: I know a lot of people will question this being in the top spot. This movie isn't for everybody. In fact, it's failing pretty miserably at the box office right now, and I'm not surprised. A lot of people will dismiss it as a "video game movie" or a "comic book movie", and that's unfortunate. I read a review (after watching it for myself) saying that SPVTW wouldn't reach anyone over the age of 25. This is nonsense. I'm in the upper half of "the mid 30's", and it affected me more than any other movie I've seen this year. Sure, I grew up on video games when they came on cartridges ("tapes" to my parents) and MTV before the advent of reality shows, but I mean, I connected with this movie on a level beyond the Zelda references and pop-up video presentation. Regardless of what the trailers and comic and video game blogs would have you believe, this movie is about interpersonal relationships between friends, lovers and siblings. Most people won't look past the computer graphics and ADD presentation, but somehow, it affected me. I'm not going to say that I related to it on a personal level because Scott's life and my life are quite dissimilar, but it made me re-evaluate and think about my own relationships. It may appear like I'm reading too much into a silly popcorn flick, but trust me, I wasn't going into this movie with a film student demeanor. I expected what everyone else expected: a bunch of pretty colors and nerdy references. But I saw what I saw and felt what I felt. And I felt genuinely bad for the some of the characters. Hell, I dreamt about them. You see, while the actual ending of the movie was fine, I personally saw no 'good' way to end the movie. So I think I subconsciously continued the movie in my head. And any movie that can make me do that deserves 4 stars and the top spot in my list. This movie is far more than it pretends to be, but I don't expect most people to understand, and that makes me a bit sad.

#2 Grease Sing-A-Along (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#3 Inception (****)
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: You'll notice that I didn't see this at the Drafthouse or in an XD Cinemark theater. We couldn't make it to the Drafthouse in our allotted babysitter time, and we DID buy XD tickets, but the XD theater's right front speaker was blown so we had to exchange tickets for a standard theater. Standard theaters suck. That being said, this movie did not suck. In fact, it was very good. It's the love child of Vanilla Sky (Abre Los Ojos) and Memento from the night they invited over The Matrix for a threesome. I'm suprised that it's so popular as its non-sequential presentation and nested realities can be disorienting for the less cerebral moviegoers. Had Nolan not directed The Dark Knight, this movie would have been relegated to the art house theaters. I would definitely recommend that people watch this movie, but honestly, it's not the movie of the century the way some people would have you believe. I think what's happening is that Inception is the first non-traditional, non-straightforward movie that a lot of people have seen, so they are astounded. If all you normally see is shit like Predators, Transformers and Twilight, then Inception seems like it's from another world. If you're already fans of Primer or Memento, you won't be as impressed.

#4 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#5 The Other Guys (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Claire
Notes: I fully admit that I had written off this movie based solely on the trailer. It looked horrible. But after a multitude of "Hey, it was pretty good!"s from a few sources and an offer to watch the kids from my sister-in-law just so that we could see the movie, I couldn't NOT go see it. And, yep, it was indeed pretty good! There were some very funny exchanges between Will Ferrell and Marky Mark, and a lot of over the top action. The slow-mo bar scene was brilliant. I found myself wishing it was a bit longer. The plot was absolutely throwaway garbage and simply existed to tie in the scenes in some loose fashion. This movie was just -made- to be chopped up into 30 3 minute youtube clips.

#6 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#7 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#8 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#9 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#10 #Machete (***) NEW
Place: Alamo Drafthouse Village w/Claire
Notes: Robert Rodriguez sure knows how to make a schlocky 1970's film in the 21st Century. If Planet Terror and Grindhouse were his tribute to the 1970's, this is his re-imagining of the genre. It was crude, rude and yes, even tattooed. But all in all it was fun, and exactly what I was expecting. One has to wonder though: if this film was made by a no-name director, would it even have been screened at mainstream theaters? Scott Sander's tribute to the 1970's Blaxploitation genre "Black Dynamite" was every bit as good as Rodriguez's "Machete", but have you even heard of that film? Didn't think so. P.S. It's good see Don Johnson finding work again. :-)

#11 Exit through the Gift Shop (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#12 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#13 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#14 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#15 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#16 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#17 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#18 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#19 The Last Exorcism (**) NEW
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: This was one of the WORST movie-going experience of my life. It was even worse than the discount cinema experience (see the 'Splice' review!) Claire and I went to the 10:00pm showing on the Saturday of opening weekend. We expected it to be packed as I had heard some good things about the movie on a News 8 Austin movie review. (They gave it a 6 out of 8.) We got there around 9:15p and rushed to the ticket booth. As we approached, we noticed two large groups of black kids ranged from maybe 15 to 25 all huddled right in front of it. At first we thought they might have been 'in line' but, no, they were content just hanging out in front of the ticket booth for some reason. After we made our way around the crowd and got tickets we made a beeline for the theater. To our surprise, even though it was just 35 minutes until showtime, there were only 3 people in the theater. We decided that we could both get snacks together since the theater was nearly empty. When we got to the lobby, the crowd of black kids was now huddled in front of the concession stand. Why? I haven't a clue, but they there were. Still, we worked our way passed them, got our snacks, and returned to the theater with plenty of time to spare. We sat in the 5th row, right in the middle. About 10 'til 10, two overweight ghetto girls plopped themselves right next to Claire and I. The one to my left could have passed for a 'Precious' stunt double. The one to Claire's right was white and wore about a pound of make-up. They both immediately pulled out their cell phones and started texting away. Yay. Through the previews and into the movie they texted. I noticed that the crowd seemed to be very loud even as the movie started. I looked around and was shocked to see that 70-75% of the crowd was black and/or ghetto. I checked my ticket stub. Nope, it wasn't a Friday movie we'd ventured into by accident. We slunked into our seats. They got louder and more rowdy. One of the texting girls kept smacking her mouth and shushing people so loudly that she was a disturbance herself. It was more than a bit ironic. Claire asked me if we should leave, but since we rarely get to go to the movies without the kids, I suggested that we just put up with it for a while longer. It got worse. People started laughing at the tense parts and yelling "That's my Nigga!" at the screen. From the 5th row, I counted 6 people texting/on their phones during the movie. (Side Note: They all had shitty phones!) By the end of the movie, I was furious. I've never once complained to theater management for anything, but I was heading right for the nearest manager as soon as the credits began to roll... not to get my money back, but simply to let him know that his ushers were worthless. As it turned out, I stumbled upon another patron complaining to the manager about the very same movie experience. I joined in and before too long, we were joined by another couple looking to complain. The manager seemed less that apologetic. He was more annoyed than anything, but he finally offered our money back. Horrible. The funny thing is that we were considering seeing the movie at Gold Class Cinema. Talk about the other end of the spectrum! Oh, and the movie? The last act needed a re-write. The first 2/3's of the movie were pretty enthralling and creepy. The wrapup was well... not consistent with the rest of the movie. Imagine if at the end of an Indiana Jones movie, it was all due to aliens. Wouldn't that be a jarring WTF? moment? Oh, wait.

#20 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#21 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#22 Predators (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Aaron
Notes: I've only seen the original Predator movie, and it's been a while since I've seen it. I've heard nothing but bad things about Predator 2 and the Aliens Vs. Predator series. In any case, this movie was OK. Decent amount of action. Throwaway plot. Pretty standard stuff. I have to mention that the CG was pretty shitty though. It had the worst CG fire I've ever seen.

#23 Splice (**)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Discount Theater by myself
Notes: It's an Adrien Brody double feature! (I saw this the week before Predators.) While I had low expectations for Predators, I had high expecations for Splice. I saw Forrest's enthusiastic Facebook posting about this movie which piqued my interest. Now, I had never seen a movie based on Forrest's recommendation, but he seemed like someone that can appreciate good cinema. He even cited the director's previous effort, Cube. I loved Cube. Splice kinda sucked though. Ridiculous plot. Almost no suspense or horror. Terrible CG. And the strangest/grossest sex scene ever. No more recommendations from Forrest.

#24 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#25 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#26 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#27 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Monday, August 16, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (8/16)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 8/16 - Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

#1 Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (****) NEW
Place: Alamo Drafthouse Village w/Madison
Notes: First things first: I know a lot of people will question this being in the top spot. This movie isn't for everybody. In fact, it's failing pretty miserably at the box office right now, and I'm not surprised. A lot of people will dismiss it as a "video game movie" or a "comic book movie", and that's unfortunate. I read a review (after watching it for myself) saying that SPVTW wouldn't reach anyone over the age of 25. This is nonsense. I'm in the upper half of "the mid 30's", and it affected me more than any other movie I've seen this year. Sure, I grew up on video games when they came on cartridges ("tapes" to my parents) and MTV before the advent of reality shows, but I mean, I connected with this movie on a level beyond the Zelda references and pop-up video presentation. Regardless of what the trailers and comic and video game blogs would have you believe, this movie is about interpersonal relationships between friends, lovers and siblings. Most people won't look past the computer graphics and ADD presentation, but somehow, it affected me. I'm not going to say that I related to it on a personal level because Scott's life and my life are quite dissimilar, but it made me re-evaluate and think about my own relationships. It may appear like I'm reading too much into a silly popcorn flick, but trust me, I wasn't going into this movie with a film student demeanor. I expected what everyone else expected: a bunch of pretty colors and nerdy references. But I saw what I saw and felt what I felt. And I felt genuinely bad for the some of the characters. Hell, I dreamt about them. You see, while the actual ending of the movie was fine, I personally saw no 'good' way to end the movie. So I think I subconsciously continued the movie in my head. And any movie that can make me do that deserves 4 stars and the top spot in my list. This movie is far more than it pretends to be, but I don't expect most people to understand, and that makes me a bit sad.

#2 Grease Sing-A-Along (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#3 Inception (****)
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: You'll notice that I didn't see this at the Drafthouse or in an XD Cinemark theater. We couldn't make it to the Drafthouse in our allotted babysitter time, and we DID buy XD tickets, but the XD theater's right front speaker was blown so we had to exchange tickets for a standard theater. Standard theaters suck. That being said, this movie did not suck. In fact, it was very good. It's the love child of Vanilla Sky (Abre Los Ojos) and Memento from the night they invited over The Matrix for a threesome. I'm suprised that it's so popular as its non-sequential presentation and nested realities can be disorienting for the less cerebral moviegoers. Had Nolan not directed The Dark Knight, this movie would have been relegated to the art house theaters. I would definitely recommend that people watch this movie, but honestly, it's not the movie of the century the way some people would have you believe. I think what's happening is that Inception is the first non-traditional, non-straightforward movie that a lot of people have seen, so they are astounded. If all you normally see is shit like Predators, Transformers and Twilight, then Inception seems like it's from another world. If you're already fans of Primer or Memento, you won't be as impressed.

#4 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#5 The Other Guys (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Claire
Notes: I fully admit that I had written off this movie based solely on the trailer. It looked horrible. But after a multitude of "Hey, it was pretty good!"s from a few sources and an offer to watch the kids from my sister-in-law just so that we could see the movie, I couldn't NOT go see it. And, yep, it was indeed pretty good! There were some very funny exchanges between Will Ferrell and Marky Mark, and a lot of over the top action. The slow-mo bar scene was brilliant. I found myself wishing it was a bit longer. The plot was absolutely throwaway garbage and simply existed to tie in the scenes in some loose fashion. This movie was just -made- to be chopped up into 30 3 minute youtube clips.

#6 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#7 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#8 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#9 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#10 Exit through the Gift Shop (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#11 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#12 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#13 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#14 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#15 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#16 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#17 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#18 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#19 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#20 Predators (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Aaron
Notes: I've only seen the original Predator movie, and it's been a while since I've seen it. I've heard nothing but bad things about Predator 2 and the Aliens Vs. Predator series. In any case, this movie was OK. Decent amount of action. Throwaway plot. Pretty standard stuff. I have to mention that the CG was pretty shitty though. It had the worst CG fire I've ever seen.

#21 Splice (**)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Discount Theater by myself
Notes: It's an Adrien Brody double feature! (I saw this the week before Predators.) While I had low expectations for Predators, I had high expecations for Splice. I saw Forrest's enthusiastic Facebook posting about this movie which piqued my interest. Now, I had never seen a movie based on Forrest's recommendation, but he seemed like someone that can appreciate good cinema. He even cited the director's previous effort, Cube. I loved Cube. Splice kinda sucked though. Ridiculous plot. Almost no suspense or horror. Terrible CG. And the strangest/grossest sex scene ever. No more recommendations from Forrest.

#22 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#23 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#24 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#25 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (8/12)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 8/12 - The Other Guys

#1 Grease Sing-A-Along (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#2 Inception (****)
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: You'll notice that I didn't see this at the Drafthouse or in an XD Cinemark theater. We couldn't make it to the Drafthouse in our allotted babysitter time, and we DID buy XD tickets, but the XD theater's right front speaker was blown so we had to exchange tickets for a standard theater. Standard theaters suck. That being said, this movie did not suck. In fact, it was very good. It's the love child of Vanilla Sky (Abre Los Ojos) and Memento from the night they invited over The Matrix for a threesome. I'm suprised that it's so popular as its non-sequential presentation and nested realities can be disorienting for the less cerebral moviegoers. Had Nolan not directed The Dark Knight, this movie would have been relegated to the art house theaters. I would definitely recommend that people watch this movie, but honestly, it's not the movie of the century the way some people would have you believe. I think what's happening is that Inception is the first non-traditional, non-straightforward movie that a lot of people have seen, so they are astounded. If all you normally see is shit like Predators, Transformers and Twilight, then Inception seems like it's from another world. If you're already fans of Primer or Memento, you won't be as impressed.

#3 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#4 The Other Guys (***1/2) NEW
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Claire
Notes: I fully admit that I had written off this movie based solely on the trailer. It looked horrible. But after a multitude of "Hey, it was pretty good!"s from a few sources and an offer to watch the kids from my sister-in-law just so that we could see the movie, I couldn't NOT go see it. And, yep, it was indeed pretty good! There were some very funny exchanges between Will Ferrell and Marky Mark, and a lot of over the top action. The slow-mo bar scene was brilliant. I found myself wishing it was a bit longer. The plot was absolutely throwaway garbage and simply existed to tie in the scenes in some loose fashion. This movie was just -made- to be chopped up into 30 3 minute youtube clips.

#5 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#6 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#7 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#8 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#9 Exit through the Gift Shop (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#10 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#11 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#12 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#13 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#14 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#15 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#16 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#17 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#18 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#19 Predators (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Aaron
Notes: I've only seen the original Predator movie, and it's been a while since I've seen it. I've heard nothing but bad things about Predator 2 and the Aliens Vs. Predator series. In any case, this movie was OK. Decent amount of action. Throwaway plot. Pretty standard stuff. I have to mention that the CG was pretty shitty though. It had the worst CG fire I've ever seen.

#20 Splice (**)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Discount Theater by myself
Notes: It's an Adrien Brody double feature! (I saw this the week before Predators.) While I had low expectations for Predators, I had high expecations for Splice. I saw Forrest's enthusiastic Facebook posting about this movie which piqued my interest. Now, I had never seen a movie based on Forrest's recommendation, but he seemed like someone that can appreciate good cinema. He even cited the director's previous effort, Cube. I loved Cube. Splice kinda sucked though. Ridiculous plot. Almost no suspense or horror. Terrible CG. And the strangest/grossest sex scene ever. No more recommendations from Forrest.

#21 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#22 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#23 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#24 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Sunday, August 01, 2010

Poker Shenanigans

This isn't a Bad Beat Story, just a Holy-Shit-WTF? Beat Story.

I'm in early position playing 25c/50c NL Hold 'em at a buddy's house. I had showed up really late, and the table already had a lot of money on it for being such small stakes. The average stack is probably about $150. I've been playing for maybe an hour. I had originally bought in for $40 and am at about $75 or so at this point.

I'm first to act, and I look down at the King of Spades and the King of Clubs. Sweet! This table is playing pretty loose, but I haven't played a lot of hands so I'm not sure how much to bet to get just a *little* action. I don't want everyone on the table in on this hand. I've seen some horrendous suck-outs already. But I also don't want to just take down 75c in blinds either. I decide to raise to $5. Fold. Fold. Fold. Shit! There goes my action! Then a guy I've never seen at our games before announces a raise.

Now I've been watching 2 new guys at the table fold almost the entire time I've been here. This guys is one of them. Up until this point, he's been playing very passively so this raise definitely has my attention. He throws out a $5 chip to call and then reaches back for a $10 stack of ones and places it next to his $5 call. Then... he reaches back for more. "Whoa! That's enough," says the dealer, correctly stopping him from string betting. The guy looks confused. "I said 'Raise'," he protested. After the entire table explains Poker 101 to the guy, he begrudgingly returns the additional stack of $10 back to his chipstack.

Fold. Fold. Then I here, "All In!" You'll never guess from who... the *other* new guy that hasn't played any hands in the last hour. Great. These two guys sit and fold for over and hour. I get pocket kings, raise to $5 and now they're going nuts on me. I look at this guy's stack, he only has around $35. He's actually the small stack at the table. Fold. Fold. Fold around back to me. I look back down at my Kings. I mean, can I really fold this? No, I certainly can't fold KK for $35. Maybe Mr. Short Stack has something like a mid pair or a Suited Ace, and he saw a little bit of money out there so he decided to just push. Oh, well, fuck it. "I'm all in too," I announce.

New Guy #1 grimaces and shows his hole cards to his neighbor. Even though he shouldn't, his neighbor visibly dismisses New Guy #1's concern. New Guy #1 calls. Well, I can only hope New Guy #1 has QQ and feels committed, but I'm doubtful of that. There's no way he would have raised me and then called two all-ins with less.

Mr. Short Stack flips over the King of Diamonds and the King of Hearts. FUCK. That's gotta mean New Guy #1 has AA. Sure enough. New Guy #1 shows the Ace of Diamonds and the Ace of Hearts. Goddammit! This is so fucking lame. Well, I guess at least I have flush outs. Mr.Short Stack doesn't even have that as his Kings share the same suits as the New Guy #1's Aces. I'm about 3% to win and 1% to tie.

Wow. Make that 0% to win. The flop comes out three non-straightable diamonds. The turn is an Ace, but it doesn't matter. It's like twisting the knife in your oppoents heart after he's already dead. To be honest, I don't recall what the river card was, but it doesn't matter. That hand sucked.

Don't feel too bad for me though. I rebought, and about 3 hands later I had 88 with a flop of 866. I more than doubled up and left up for the night. That's poker.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (7/29)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 7/29 - Inception

#1 Grease Sing-A-Along (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#2 Inception (****)
Place: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Claire
Notes: You'll notice that I didn't see this at the Drafthouse or in an XD Cinemark theater. We couldn't make it to the Drafthouse in our allotted babysitter time, and we DID buy XD tickets, but the XD theater's right front speaker was blown so we had to exchange tickets for a standard theater. Standard theaters suck. That being said, this movie did not suck. In fact, it was very good. It's the love child of Vanilla Sky (Abre Los Ojos) and Memento from the night they invited over The Matrix for a threesome. I'm suprised that it's so popular as its non-sequential presentation and nested realities can be disorienting for the less cerebral moviegoers. Had Nolan not directed The Dark Knight, this movie would have been relegated to the art house theaters. I would definitely recommend that people watch this movie, but honestly, it's not the movie of the century the way some people would have you believe. I think what's happening is that Inception is the first non-traditional, non-straightforward movie that a lot of people have seen, so they are astounded. If all you normally see is shit like Predators, Transformers and Twilight, then Inception seems like it's from another world. If you're already fans of Primer or Memento, you won't be as impressed.

#3 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#4 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#5 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#6 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#7 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#8 Exit through the Gift Shop (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#9 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#10 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#11 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#12 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#13 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#14 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#15 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#16 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#17 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#18 Predators (**) NEW
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Aaron
Notes: I've only seen the original Predator movie, and it's been a while since I've seen it. I've heard nothing but bad things about Predator 2 and the Aliens Vs. Predator series. In any case, this movie was OK. Decent amount of action. Throwaway plot. Pretty standard stuff. I have to mention that the CG was pretty shitty though. It had the worst CG fire I've ever seen.

#19 Splice (**) NEW
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Discount Theater by myself
Notes: It's an Adrien Brody double feature! (I saw this the week before Predators.) While I had low expectations for Predators, I had high expecations for Splice. I saw Forrest's enthusiastic Facebook posting about this movie which piqued my interest. Now, I had never seen a movie based on Forrest's recommendation, but he seemed like someone that can appreciate good cinema. He even cited the director's previous effort, Cube. I loved Cube. Splice kinda sucked though. Ridiculous plot. Almost no suspense or horror. Terrible CG. And the strangest/grossest sex scene ever. No more recommendations from Forrest.

#20 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#21 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#22 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#23 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (7/22)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 7/22 - Splice, Predators

#1 Grease Sing-A-Along (****)
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#2 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#3 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#4 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#5 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#6 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#7 Exit through the Gift Shop (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#8 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#9 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#10 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#11 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#12 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#13 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#14 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#15 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#16 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#17 Predators (**) NEW
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Aaron
Notes: I've only seen the original Predator movie, and it's been a while since I've seen it. I've heard nothing but bad things about Predator 2 and the Aliens Vs. Predator series. In any case, this movie was OK. Decent amount of action. Throwaway plot. Pretty standard stuff. I have to mention that the CG was pretty shitty though. It had the worst CG fire I've ever seen.

#18 Splice (**) NEW
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Discount Theater by myself
Notes: It's an Adrien Brody double feature! (I saw this the week before Predators.) While I had low expectations for Predators, I had high expecations for Splice. I saw Forrest's enthusiastic Facebook posting about this movie which piqued my interest. Now, I had never seen a movie based on Forrest's recommendation, but he seemed like someone that can appreciate good cinema. He even cited the director's previous effort, Cube. I loved Cube. Splice kinda sucked though. Ridiculous plot. Almost no suspense or horror. Terrible CG. And the strangest/grossest sex scene ever. No more recommendations from Forrest.

#19 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#20 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#21 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#22 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (7/17)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 7/17 - Grease Sing-A-Long, Exit through the Gift Shop

#1 Grease Sing-A-Along (****) NEW
Place: Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar w/Audrey (subbing for Claire)
Notes: I hesitated to put this in at all because this movie originally came out in 1978, but I am including it for two reasons: 1) It is a movie that I saw in the theater in 2010 2) It's not technically the same movie. All the songs (except the intro theme song for some strange reason) have animated lyrics and extras on the screen. They decided to get creative when they animated the "Greased Lightning" lyrics because they say "shit" (#*@$) , "tit" (a picture of a cow showing her udder), "the chicks'll cream" (whipped cream), and "pussy" (a pussy cat, naturally). The animation was all well done. Apparently they spent $100,000 re-doing the film. It's definitely a new experience. FYI: Grease is the gayest movie I'll admit to loving. And the sing-a-long version is even more awesome.

#2 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#3 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#4 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#5 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#6 Despicable Me (***)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#7 Exit through the Gift Shop (***) NEW
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I saw this on Pete's recommendation. It's a documentary about street art. It was entertaining. There is no other way for me to describe it. It wasn't the best (King of Kong) or worst (Kurt and Courtney) documentary I've ever seen. The big hook, whether or not the entire thing was a hoax put on by Banksy, was irrelevant to me. I simply don't care. Unless you're really into documentaries or street art, I'd wait for it to show up on cable or on Netflix streaming.

#8 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#9 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#10 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#11 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#12 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#13 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#14 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#15 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#16 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#17 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#18 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#19 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#20 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Monday, July 12, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (7/12)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 7/12 - Despicable Me

#1 Toy Story 3 (****)
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#2 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#3 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#4 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#5 Despicable Me (***) NEW
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Entire Family (including Mom/Dad/Sister)
Notes: My parents and sister hadn't seen a 3D film in a long time (i.e. they don't have a 5 year old) so they were pretty impressed with the visuals. I'm more jaded. They were good, not great. The story was actually a little different than I expected, in a good way. My sister and Claire got a little teary-eyed, but it's not a sob story movie. Overall, it's a well made, enjoyable movie.

#6 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#7 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#8 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#9 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#10 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#11 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#12 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#13 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#14 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#15 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#16 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#17 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#18 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Wednesday, July 07, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (7/7)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 7/7 - The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid)

#1 Toy Story 3 (****) NEW
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#2 The Kung Fu Kid (aka The Karate Kid) (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek with Madison
Notes: I really enjoyed this re-make/re-imagining. I have nothing but praise for Jaden Smith. His acting was quite good. He showed good range. His athleticism and martial arts skills were infinitely more believable than Macchio's. I enjoyed noting the parallels between the original movie and the new one. The story is still as far fetched as ever, but also still as fun. Jackie Chan was great too. The name is the worst part of this film as there is no karate in it.

#3 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#4 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#5 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#6 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#7 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#8 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#9 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#10 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#11 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#12 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#13 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#14 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#15 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#16 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#17 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Monday, June 21, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings (6/21)

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (0 to 4 stars) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 6/21 - Toy Story 3 and Get Him to the Greek. Also changed format to be more readable.

#1 Toy Story 3 (****) NEW
Place: In 3D XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Superb writing and direction. Funny and heart warming. The 3D and CG-ness don't even matter.

#2 Kick-Ass (***1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl easily steals the show. I never read the comics so no comment on adaptation.

#3 How to Train Your Dragon (***1/2)
Place: 3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but not overly so. Good use of 3D.

#4 Iron Man 2 (***)
Place: In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit too unbelievable even for a comic book movie. Iron Man does not have memorable villains.

#5 Shutter Island (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I found it quite enjoyable.

#6 A Town Called Panic (***)
Place: Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Notes: Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation, but technically, it's no where near the quality of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.

#7 Get Him to the Greek (***)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Notes: I didn't know much about the film, but Pete had wanted to see it so I gave it a try. I knew nothing of Russell Brand going into this (his accent seemed almost fake at first.) The Drafhouse played his stand-up before the movie, and I could have watched just that for 2 hours. I found the movie very funny at times and more than a little bit sad in many places which I didn't expect. Couldn't stop thinking about how huge Jonah Hill was though.

#8 The Crazies (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of 28 Days Later.

#9 Prince of Persia (**1/2)
Place: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Notes: Better than I expected, but not great. The CG was abundant. High end production. I thought Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.

#10 Shrek Forever After (**1/2)
Place: 3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Notes: Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.

#11 A Nightmare on Elm Street (**)
Venue: Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Notes: I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs to get fired. He looks like he has Down's Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive: isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.

#12 Alice in Wonderland (**)
Venue: 3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
Notes: I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but this didn't work out so well. Maybe because Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?

#13 Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief (**)
Venue: Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Notes: Say what you want in defense of the novels, but this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.

#14 Youth in Revolt (*1/2)
Venue: Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
Notes: I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out. That was a mistake. The story was terrible. The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He plays himself in every single goddamn movie.

#15 The Spy Next Door (*1/2)
Venue: Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Notes: Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I didn't expect much, and that's what I got.

#16 Furry Vengeance (*)
Venue: Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Notes: Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot, terrible special effects), it's almost so bad that it's good. But it's still bad.

Friday, June 18, 2010

All my Xbox 360's

01. Launch Xbox 360. Died after 2.5 years. Fixed.
02. Arcade Unit bought used while they were scarce. Sold to Sean.
03. Arcade Unit bought as 2nd unit for upstairs. Returned when I found Premium Version (#04)
04. Bought when I found a Premium 20GB version at GameStop while they were scarce. Went upstairs.
05. The Halo Edition X360. Sold #04 to pay for it. E74'd and fixed. CURRENTLY IN LIVING ROOM.
06. The 1st Elite. 1st with HDMI. Sold #01 (after being fixed) to Mike to buy it.
07. The Red Elite (Resident Evil SE). Sold #06 with a 20GB to buy it.
08. Bought another Red Elite after finding a better deal on Dell.com. Returned #07. DVD went bad. Fixed. CURRENTLY IN GAME ROOM.
09. Bought 3rd Xbox 360 Elite for bedroom. CURRENTLY IN BEDROOM.
10. Xbox 250GB Slim (TBD)

Monday, June 07, 2010

Places I like to eat at...

Places I like to eat at...

As often as possible:
Tacodeli
Rudy's
Salt Lick
Chuy's
Homeslice
Rounders
Alamo Drafthouse

On occasion:
Hut's Hamburgers
Casa G's
Charlie's Steakhouse
Mangia
Saccone's
Freebirds
Serranos
Texadelphia
Pluckers
Whataburger
Hooters
Macoroni Grill
Olive Garden
Gattiland
Culver's

Special Occasions:
Gino's
Hula Hut
Maggiano's
Buca di Beppo
Alamo Cafe (San Antonio)
Mi Tierra (San Antonio)

Thursday, June 03, 2010

2010 Movies Relative Rankings

Here is the list of movies that I saw at the theater in 2010. They are rated (out of 10) and ranked relative to each other. Check for newer posts updating this list with new movies as I see them.

Last Update: 6/3 - Prince of Persia and A Town Called Panic added.

[New Rank - Old Rank - Highest Rank - (Score Out of 10) Movie/Notes]
01 - 01 - 01 - (8) Kick-Ass
Drafthouse Lake Creek by myself
Enjoyable, aestheticized violence. Hit Girl
easily steals the show. I never read the
comics so no comment on adaptation.
02 - 02 - 02 - (8) How to Train Your Dragon
3D Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Better than I expected. A bit preachy, but
not overly so. Good use of 3D.
03 - 03 - 03 - (7) Iron Man 2
In XD theater at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
I enjoyed it more than the original film. A bit
too unbelievable even for a comic book movie.
Iron Man does not have memorable villains.
04 - 04 - 04 - (7) Shutter Island
Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Well acted and directed. Interesting plot albeit
with a pretty see-thru twist. Even still, I
found it quite enjoyable.
05 - ** - 05 - (7) A Town Called Panic
Drafthoue Ritz w/Aaron
Saw this subtitled. It's stop motion animation,
but technically, it's no where near the quality
of Henry Selick's work. It was funny, but less
so than I expected. Better if you're drunk/high.
06 - 05 - 05 - (6) The Crazies
Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
Reminded a bit of Left 4 Dead. Pretty standard
virus/zombie fare. It was basically a clone of
28 Days Later.
07 - ** - 06 - (6) Prince of Persia
Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Pete
Better than I expected, but not great. The CG
was abundant. High end production. I thought
Chesty Jake was just fine as the Prince.
08 - 06 - 06 - (6) Shrek Forever After
3D in XD at Cinemark Pflugerville w/Family
Shrek's cultrual gags -were- cool, but they've
gotten stale. The underlying story is pretty
weak. I've seen better (and worse) kid's films.
09 - 07 - 07 - (5) A Nightmare on Elm Street
Drafthouse Lake Creek w/Claire
I like Jackie Earle Haley, and he does a good job
as the new Freddy, but the make-up artist needs
to get fired. He looks like he has Down's
Syndrome. Also, the scenes were repetitive:
isolate character, daydream, kill. Rinse. Repeat.
10 - 08 - 08 - (5) Alice in Wonderland
3D at Drafthouse Village Baby Day w/Family
I love Tim Burton's twisted take on things, but
this didn't work out so well. Maybe because
Alice in Wonderland is already pretty twisted?
11 - 09 - 09 - (4) Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief
Cinemark Plfuger w/Maddie
Say what you want in defense of the novels, but
this is clearly an attempt to cash in on Harry
Potter crowd. Far too little far too late.
12 - 10 - 10 - (3) Youth in Revolt
Drafthouse Ritz Theater #2 w/Claire
I saw this because Master Pancake was sold out.
That was a mistake. The story was terrible.
The acting was mostly terrible. Michael Cera is
the least talented 'actor' in recent memory. He
plays himself in every single goddamn movie.
13 - 11 - 11 - (3) The Spy Next Door
Cinemark Pflugerville w/Maddie
Man, Jackie Chan. What are you doing? You've
fallen to Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) levels. I
didn't expect much, and that's what I got.
14 - 12 - 12 - (2) Furry Vengeance
Cinemark Round Rock Outlets w/Maddie
Madison loved this movie. And while it in no way
can be considered good cinema (luicrous plot,
terrible special effects), it's -almost- so bad
that it's good. But it's still bad.

Monday, May 03, 2010

Quick FAQ on Street Fighter IV Focus Attacks, by Rob.

Wrote this up super quick for a friend...

What are a FA's properties?

- It is initiated by holding down MP+MK. You must be on the ground.
- Can be cancelled by dashing out. This is known as a FADC (Focus Attack Dash Cancel). It's very important.
- It absorbs ONE (non-armor breaking) hit. The absorbed hit does 'white damage' which will slowly recover if you are not hit while it's recovering.
- It absorbs both jumping and ground attacks.
- It does not absorb throws.
- You cannot die from 'white damage'.
- It can launch a (counter) attack hit by letting go of MK+MP.
- You can enter into the FA stance immediately after doing a special move. It will interrupt the special move animation with a FA animation.

What kind of attacks can you do?

- It has three levels of attacks.
- Level 1 pretty much acts like a normal attack.
- Level 2 will crumple stun if it hits.
- Level 3 is unblockable and will crumple stun your opponent.
- Level/Strength of attack is determined by how long you hold MP+MK.
- Not all characters have the same 'reach' on their attacks. Experiment with each.

What are some uses for FAs?

- Absorbing hits. This is especially useful for dealing with projectile chracters or for punishing (countering) jump in attacks. If you're far away, it's almost always a good idea to Dash Cancel out of the FA once the hit is absorbed. That way you're free to move/attack again.
- Building up your Revenge (Ultra) Meter. The white damage you take while aborbing hits will still build your Revenge Meter up even though you get that damage restored to your health bar. If you notice you're almost at enough Revenge Meter to get an Ultra. Try absorbing a fireball or something from a safe distance to get it over the top.
- Advancing on your oppoent without jumping. You can absorb an attack and then dash cancel forward to move closer to your opponent without taking real damage or jumping.
- Baiting people to do things like jump. If you start a FA, people might try to jump over you. If they do, then just Dash Back (B, B) to cancel out and punish their jump.
- Setting up combos or throws. If you FADC after certain special moves, you'll be free to unleash a big combo or Ultra or simply escape.
Example 1:
- Ryu does a dragon punch that connects. This normally pops the opponent up and Ryu goes up too and then comes back down.
- If Ryu connects with the DP and then FA, then Dashes (FADC), he'll pop the opponent up, but then be free to do his Ultra which will juggle the opponent.
- The command would look like this:
1. Dragon Punch: F, D, DF+P
2. FA: MP+MK
3. Dash Cancel: F, F (Don't let go of MP+MK until AFTER the dash comes out)
4. Ultra: D, DF, F, D, DF, F+PPP

Shorthand: DP, FADC, Ultra

Example 2: Let's say the Dragon Punch is blocked. That's OK. Now we can just change the ending to either a throw attempt or a dash away into safety.
1. Dragon Punch: F, D, DF+P
2. FA: MP+MK
3. Dash Cancel: F, F (Don't let go of MP+MK until AFTER the dash comes out)
4. Throw: LP+LK

or Dash Away to Safety

3. Dash Cancel Backwards: B, B (Don't let go of MP+MK until AFTER the dash comes out)
4. Phew! You cannot be punished for getting your DP blocked!

Tips (I'll update this as I think of new tips):
- Don't spam the dash cancels. Hit F,F or B,B exactly twice. Don't hit F,F,F,F. The dashes are buffered. So if you get attacked and you FA, let get of MP+MK to unleash your counter and and immediately hit F, F twice and only twice. This should absorb the hit, counter with your own hit, crumple stun the opponent and then dash you right up next to him ready for you to pounce. Don't worry that the action kinda pauses for a split second during the animation. The dash is buffered and it WILL come out.

Caveats:
- Remember: if you are hit while you are recovering white damage, the white damage will disappear, effectively making it 'real damage'.
- Don't absorb TOO many projectiles back to back, because you'll take lots of white damage... and all it takes is ONE jab and all that white damage turns to 'real damage'.
- Get to know your opponents auto-multi-hit attacks (like Ken's Dragon Punch, Ryu's Overhead Punch, Juri's Pinwheel, etc) because those will hit twice (or more) so fast that they'll break through the FA which can only absorb 1 hit.
- Get to know which attacks are "Armor Breaking". These will break right through any FA, even on 1 hit. You'll know it's armor breaking because you'll hear a sound like glass breaking and little glass shards animate on the screen at the point of the armor break.
- Do NOT overuse FAs. They are another weapon in your arsenal. Don't just FA all day. Use them to Mix up your game. Make them afraid to jump in or throw out random sweeps.